The world of online Dominance and submission is riddled with skepticism and disbelief that anyone can really live and enjoy a relationship online. The fact of it all is that there are an endless numbers of people experiencing a form of D/s called cyber D/s. Whether it be because they can not live it in real time due to partners that don’t understand, or they are exploring their sexuality safely a cyber relationship with a D/s feel is developed.
With being a cyber submissive comes online training. When I was an online submissive it was facilitated with a web cam and microphone for conversation and a long list of chat rooms that I would frequent. In these rooms I would participate in ritualized role play from serving drinks from an imaginary and well stocked bar to pole-dancing and playing in a fully stocked dungeon. Anything I wanted ‘experience’ was available to me.
But that wasn’t my main goal. I wanted a taste for what being a submissive was like. I longed for rules, and things to do that would keep me on task and I was even curious about discipline. I had an online Dominant that structured rules for me and set up daily tasks I had to do. At first they were mostly sexual in nature and I didn’t have a problem with that. Then they branched into maintaining my home, setting up a journal, emailing them everyday. My current Master and I started out online due to the distance between us. He set up personal grooming rules that I keep to this day.
The Dominant I was with in the beginning had me reading and studying a lot of different websites about different D/s and BDSM things. I was then to report back to him with what I learned as well as questions I had for him to answer. It was a great experience that he was so invested in my learning. While he wasn’t much for rules, he was a great mentor that I am very thankful for having in my life at one point.
The only way that training will work for a submissive is only if they do it. You have to hold a lot to the honor system. So it’s safe to assume that some people just pretend they did it and those people really aren’t in it like I was. There are submissives that will obey you and do all you request of them without needing proof that it was accomplished. For me, online D/s was the starting point for my learning.
Yes, online training can work if you both are honest with each other and trust that you will only get out of it what you put in. It goes without saying that the submissive who pretends to follow the rules will not get as much out of it and may hop from one online Dom to another while those that learn and grow honestly will develop deeper relationships and learning. Maybe one day moving to real time submission.
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