Looking for a mistress?

The first rule is, mistresses and dominatrices don’t just grow on trees, you have to make yourself an attractive option.
Whether you want to be a submissive as part of a relationship, or you’re just seeking relief, it’s important to understand that ‘I’ll do anything you want’ is something we hear everyday, especially from men.

First of all, decide on what it is you’re looking for. If you want something based around your needs, your desires and your schedule, then I’d recommend putting your money where your libido is and paying for a dominatrix.
As a mistress, I expect to be in command all the time. I expect you to be at my beck and call, it certainly won’t work the other way round.

So, I’ve put together a handy guide on how you can approach a prospective dominant without coming across as a complete dick.
‘Hello, mistress’ is not an opening line My Fetlife account, and even some of my dating apps, have a tonne of one-line messages like this. I’m not your mistress, and neither do I want to be when you’ve started with the BDSM equivalent of ‘hey, babe’. Don’t top from the bottom
Don’t start with a list of stuff you want to try. While that might come in handy later down the line, I’m more interested in hearing about you as a human.
Also, if you’re only going to be available for the things you want to do, on the days you want to do it, this isn’t going to work. Don’t just list all the things you want to do .

Be more than just a submissive or slave.

Unfortunately, too many submissive men think just by saying they’ll do what I want, I’ll want them to do it. However, my joy comes from being in control of another human who has made themselves an attractive prospect, not a doormat.
We’re picky bitches, and we want to see you have a interesting life outside of kink.

Don’t be ‘shy’ As soon as someone starts saying ‘I’d love to do more, but I’m shy’ I switch off. Nope, not for me. I want someone who has the confidence, passion and desire to really start experimenting. I’m sorry you’re shy, but no one bursts into their first BDSM munch or meet-up like Lord Flashheart. We all started somewhere, so you can too.

Get out Local munches and meet-ups are a great way to get out and prove you’re willing in person.  Frankly, our default status is to suspect any submissive bloke is just looking to wank off online, so being willing to attend events is a great way to start. Stop watching free fem-dom porn That’s not us, that’s not what we do, that’s never going to happen.
Several dominatrices will offer a bespoke video if you’re that keen, but the trash thrown up on free porn sites is literally just there to keep you clicking. The fantasy you see in a five minute clip will never reflect what it’s really like to serve someone, so stop trying to compare.

 We’re human, we’re vulnerable and we’re more than just a kink.

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Is Cyber BDSM safe?

The question of the reality of BDSM cyber interactions is one that is guaranteed to bring up an emotional disagreement at any time. There are two schools of thought that argue this point the most. First you have those who believe in the reality of cyber interactions, and second you have those who do not believe in them at all, insisting they are nothing but fantasy. There is a third group, these are the people that tend to straddle the fence and believe that cyber can be real but it doesn't hold a candle to real life in any way shape or form. Whether or not one sees a cyber interaction as real seems to depend upon the person's view of cyber. If a person views cyber as just another reality, then their interactions will indeed be very real to them. If a person views cyber as nothing but a fantasy play land, then their interactions will not be real to them at all. A cyber relationship, in my experience, can indeed be very real. I base this on personal experience as well as knowledge of the human mind. The mind is the most influential part of a person. As well, it is the largest sexual organ any single human being can have. Cyber interactions deal directly with the mind. There are no visual inputs that can distract from the information being received by the mind. They require a greater ability to put feelings and thoughts into words. Because of this, one can create a mental and emotional bond much faster online. Further, cyber offers a sense of anonymity that allows people to open up faster and deeper than they would in a face to face conversation. This enhances the feeling of emotional closeness to the person you are interacting with and strengthens the mental bond. This bond, is very real to the one who feels it. The emotional responses of arguments, disagreements and such are the same for online relationships as those in reality. In some cases, the response can be more intense due to the fact that cyber interactions deal directly with the mind and heart. Words are one of the most powerful influences in a person's life. Cyber is a world created through words. Because of the power of words, cyber can be very much real. For example, if someone tells you "You look nice today" it makes you feel good. If someone says that online, it makes you feel good too. Cyber, however, contains quite a bit of fantasy. It is easy to get lost in the fantasy part of it. As well, it is dangerous to believe that everything that happens during kinky cyber sex or scenes, are an exact replica of what would happen in real life. Just because you kneel in cyber, does not mean you can do it in reality. Or just because you can type that you flogged someone, doesn't mean you have the experience or knowledge to actually do so in real life. It is important to keep the fantasy part of cyber interactions seperated from the reality part. There are many ways you can do that over the internet, some might be safer than others, but all in all you need to keep it safe , sane and consensual. As always. Source

BDSM cyber play

Real Life play is wonderful. It's exhilarating, it's fun and it can be intensely erotic. And some people are lucky enough to be able to play whenever they want. Usually though, there are limitations - time, distance, other obligations - which mean we can't just whip up a scene whenever we feel like it. It's a big, wide world out there, and sometimes its hundreds - or even thousands - of miles that separate us from our play partner. However, RL isn't the only way to explore and experience BDSM.

It is often said, that our most developed sexual organ is our brain - and that's were cyber-BDSM comes in. Of course, everyone's heard of cybersex. There are a plethora of online chat rooms where you can go to have one-night cyber-stands, and talk to people you don't know in third person all pretending you're getting down to hot and kinky sex - this article isn't about them. Rather, I want to look at how technology can work in and enhance a BDSM relationship.

One of the most difficult things about cyber play is that the only toy you have is your imagination. It's also one of the most exciting. This can be that grey area where fantasy and reality meet, where you can try out new things safe in the knowledge that the worst thing that will happen is the connection dropping. It can give you the confidence to explore that thing you've been thinking about for a while, but are too embarrassed / nervous / unsure whether you'll like it to bring it up face to face.

For the idle amongst you, cyber has the advantage of taking very little physical effort. No squeezing oneself into a 22" corset, or ending up with a pulled muscle from too much flogging.

You don't have to spend two hours getting ready to indulge in an online scene, and there's no worry of getting pulled over by the police whilst you’re driving to the venue dressed in a rubber cat suit with a bag full of floggers. Cyber is fun, safe and sexy. And you can enjoy it from the comfort of your computer chair.

Try out this site for free. It's safe , sane and consensual!

Access Here

Beautiful Domina for obedient slaves

Before you visit Mistress Monica:

Open your mind .. empty your thoughts and say this outloud : My kink drawer will be open, I will enjoy my spankings and look forward to obeying every command Miss Monica gives me, shamelessly!

Schedule:
I am on almost daily .. I am sometimes available for appointments so you may email me via CC mail and request for an appointment if I am free !

Turn-Ons:
I am happy to consider both novice and experienced trainees and will look forward to receiving your humble application to worship at the temple of My sex. You will exist solely for, and your goal will be, My own personal pleasure and satisfaction!

Turn-Offs:
Disobedient slaves .

What you can expect from my show:
If you would like to experience the honour of serving beneath Me then you may apply to serve Me . However, you should be aware that I accept only the very highest standards of devotion and obedience and should you fail to please Me in any way, you will of course expect to receive suitable punishment (within pre-set limits).

Optional Activities:
Bondage & discipline, Dominatrix, Leather, Latex & rubber, Legs, feet & shoes, Lingerie & stockings, Outfits, Role playing, Sadomasochism (S&M), Slaves, Spanking, Blindfold, Breast/nipple torture, Candle wax, Chains, Chastity devices, Clamps and clips, Cock and ball torture, Collars, Discipline, Domination, Gags, Gas masks, Handcuffs, Heels, Humiliation, Kneeling, Lipstick, Lycra/spandex, Masks, Masochism, Mistress/slave, Orgasm Denial, Pony play, PVC, Riding Crops, Sensory Deprivation, Submission, Teasing, Temperature Play, Whips

Why I Am Here:
Being naturally Dominant, I very much enjoy chatting with gentlemen who wish to experience sensual and sexual Domination at the expert hands of a highly experienced and stunningly beautiful strap-on wearing Goddess.

More BDSM Here!

Talk Free online with Real Mistresses!

BDSM slave session online

If you’re trying to learn how to be a slave, you might want to know more before you get started. With online BDSM slave training, you can find out more about yourself, your desires/fantasies, and what a slave should do for their Dominant. This sort of training can help you to develop the kind of mindset where you can completely please your partner.

Far too many submissives jump into serving the first that comes along. While I can understand the desire to do so this is a very dangerous thing to do. It is very important to be patient as a new submissive just starting out. If you leap before you are ready many terrible things can happen.


Entering into a relationship with an individual who is not competent or responsible enough to be a Dominant. Past horror stories have included practicing new submissive techniques on the submissive with horrific consequences (most techniques should be practiced on a pillow or towel first), a Dom/me pushing the submissive past their limits, ignoring safewords, not checking in during an intense scene, zero aftercare and no debriefing time. Worst of course is the mentally unstable abuser who is pretending to be a Dominant but as no true desire to take care of and/or protect their submissive.


If you don’t truly understand yourself and your desire you can never know what it is that you want and should ask for. More importantly you can never know what to avoid like the plague to ensure you don’t do something that you will later reject.

While many people will argue that you can never know if you like something until you try, I beg to differ. It’s true somethings may need a try before you can truly determine if you like them or not. For example if you like being spanked by a hand, then perhaps you may like being spanked with a paddle. Under a safe environment this might be something that in the future you might want to try to determine if you like it or not.

However, if you know yourself and you know you hate the sight of blood, then you know to stay away from needle play, cutting and all activities that cause blood to be drawn. If you are claustrophobic, then you need to stay away from restrictive hoods, mummification and caging/confinement scenes. You don’t need to test them out to know if you like them. You know because you know yourself and your desires. You have done the research on each activity and compared it to what you want out of a scene or relationship and you can fairly accurately determine whether or not these activities are right for you before you ever try them.

Just because you are submissive does not mean you don’t have a voice. In the end it is you who decides how you will serve and what you are willing and not willing to do. Don’t let anybody force you to do something, because they won’t have to live with the regret, but you will. Take your time and be patient, learn from a safe distance, and discover a deeper sense of yourself before you enter into any type of activity.

Online BDSM slave training can be a safer way to learn about BDSM, submission and your own desires. The reason being is because you can view everything from distance giving you the time to soak in everything that you learn. Online training can include:


Specific Lessons – teaching you how to be a better slave for you. you will learn how training might look when you’re with you a partner. You might find out what future bdsm slave training consists of and how you can perform in the best way possible for your future Dom/me.


Tips – you can gain tips from experienced Dominants and submissives to help you better handle anything from managing painful sessions to dealing with sub drop after an intense session to avoiding potentially fake/dangerous Dominants. You can also have access other slaves, showing the potential of your submission and giving you a glimpse into what is truly possible.


Instructions – you can also learn about the proper slave commands and positions. While your Dominant might use different instructions, having a starting point can help you understand what may be expected of you.

The privacy that comes with online submissive training is also a benefit, as you don’t have to share what you are learning with anyone.

So take the time you need to learn how to be a slave before you ever hand that job over to someone else. The more time you spend with yourself the better you will be prepared when the time to serve actually comes. In doing so, you will show your future Dominant just how much you care about their approval and being the best slave you can for them, which will please them all the more.

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BDSM Mistress - My personal beliefs are not negotiable!

                                                  

Like most powerful women , I love playing with men's minds. I was born with a natural dominant personality , so obviously I'm deeply fond to BDSM activities, but most of all I'm a Femme Supremacist.Power exchange is My game. Good manners , charm , intelligence and creativity will get you quite far in my company. Some of the things I'm interested in : humiliation , CBT , sissification , worshipping, tease and denial, orgasm control , chastity, objectification, puppy training, financial domination

I'm not an 18 yo barbie-doll anymore, so don't expect me to act like one or treat me as such.I'm a grown-up woman, well educated and open minded ,I use my brain when I talk to you and I expect you to do the same in return. Don't you fucking dare calling yourself submissive and putting conditions to your submission. I require TOTAL SUBMISSION and I DO NOT take requests. I'm not forcing anyone to share My beliefs, so don't try to sell Me your ideas on D/s. My personal beliefs are not negotiable!

You can expect meeting a real Woman ,one who will connect with you on a psychological level. Sophisticated , stylish and real , I'm offering you the chance to get to know me.I train sissy sluts ,love to humiliate you and drain your wallet. Financial domination, toys training, D/s stories , CBT , orgasm control and denial ,cuckolds , chastity- I am THE ONE to show you the way to submission. I've come here to explore my darkest side and be your only reason to live.I've always been an independent person , a brat as a young woman and later becoming fully aware of My power and ability to make others surrender to My wishes.Obviously , a stubborn , independent woman like Me can only be a Domme.

~SURRENDER YOURSELF TO A GODDESS~

What makes a healthy submissive - online or real life

1. The healthy submissive is capable of, and thrives on, intense, intimate, emotionally open relationships. This is often evident in the number of nourishing, sustaining, and life affirming friendships she makes over the years.

2. The healthy submissive is a giver. She often needs help to ration herself because her impulses nearly always lead her to want to do good for others.

3. The healthy submissive is capable of intense joy, especially in the context of a sustaining relationship.

4. The healthy submissive finds significant relaxation when properly related. She is at ease in that place.

5. The healthy submissive has finely tuned interpersonal sensitivity. She is reactive to subtle shifts in the emotional tone of others.

6. The healthy submissive has a fluidity of self, a flexibility that enables her to adapt to changing circumstances.

7. The healthy submissive is playful.

8. The healthy submissive has no more than the usual cultural conflicts about her body, and its goodness and beauty.

9. The healthy submissive takes pride in her accomplishments.

10. The healthy submissive accepts herself as she is, knowing that while her culture values independence and self sufficiency, she has strong dependency needs and that there is no inherent "wrongness" about those needs.

11. The healthy submissive seeks nourishing relationships.

12. The healthy submissive, in accepting herself "as is" is tolerant of others. But neither will she allow anyone to tell her what her truth should be.

13. The healthy submissive has a reasonable self concept, aware of her difficulties as well as her strengths.

14. The healthy submissive hunger is to be the object of an intense and penetrating understanding. When her nature is understood and she is held in a loving and firm frame, her devotion is almost limitless. The healthy submissive has an enormous capacity for devotion, from which springs her service.

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Domination is my lifestyle - MIstress Viv Online Dominiatrix

Mistress Viv is a Sensual , Strict  Mistress , Dominatrix ,Caring, Dominantand She wants to show you that the world of BDSM ,pain and Domination can be a continuing exploration for the experienced, and need not be intimidating for the novice or interested observer.

She finds great pleasure in manipulating, humiliating and torturing males both physically and psychologically. She is educated, well-spoken, leggy and in a position to indulge her bossy streak. She likes to play in a spontaneous, fun and natural way; entirely free of the cliches and theatrics of ‘traditional’ BDSM as She is a naturally dominant woman and certainly not going through the motions. In fact, you could call Her the ultimate, real, humiliatrix and foot goddess.

Mistress Viv welcomes session enquiries from submissives, fetishists, novices and experienced players alike, 

Turn-Ons:

Fetish & Domination - BDSM slave training for inexperienced. Sessions from mild to extreme. Masochists welcome. CFNM. Edgeplay. Cam2cam preferred. Be prepared with toys & household items to use for CBT, Nipple Play, Anal, Gagging, Spanking, Wax, BreathPlay.

Respect my limits as I respect yours! I am solely Dominant, no switch. 

What you can expect from my show:

The perfect tease with a kinky & perverted mind. Leg & Ass worship. Wigs. Queening. Financial Domination. Ignore Fetish. Extensive collection of Latex/Leather, High Heels & Boots, Nylons, large Strapon Cocks, Whips. 

NO NUDITY, NO TOY PLAY, DON'T CALL ME BB!

Optional Activities:Bondage & discipline, Dominatrix, Leather, Latex & rubber, Legs, feet & shoes, Lingerie & stockings, Piercings & tattoos, Sadomasochism (S&M), Spanking, Other, Armpits, Breast/nipple torture, Candle wax, Chastity devices, Clamps and clips, Cock and ball torture, Cross-dressing, Discipline, Domination, Feminization, Fur, Gloves, Handcuffs, Hands, Heels, Humiliation, Humor, Lipstick, Lycra/spandex, Make up, Mistress/slave, Necks, Nylons, Orgasm Denial, PVC, Riding Crops, Satin / Silk, Socks, Strap-ons, Teasing, Whips

Register for a session Here!

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Emotional and Financial Dependency

Emotional Degradation and Emotional Subjection

Emotional degradation is a form of emotional SM that goes beyond embarrassment or humiliation into the realm of stripping the bottom of self-esteem or inner resources. For many people being embarrassed, humiliated, or even degraded can be very hot. Where to draw the line, and how to be sure that the loss of self-esteem stays under control and does not pervade aspects of life where it is unwanted can be very difficult to assess.

The heavier and riskier forms of this kind of play bring up questions about potentially damaging someone's self-respect both in and out of scene. While many males find it very hot to be told their cocks are small and unsatisfying in scene, and many females and males alike find it very hot to be told they are dirty, disgusting, or too ugly to desire, it would potentially be damaging to reinforce someone's negative self-image. To tell someone that he is stupid, useless, or undesirable may be hot for the person at the time, but it carries a lot of risk if it is repeated daily. It is the responsibility of the partners to consider the long-term self-esteem issues involved and to be sure that this kind of play does not lead into nonconsensual areas that sneak up on the partners over time.

More than most kinds of risky play, emotional degradation seems to risk a relationship's crossing the line into abuse. If the submissive or bottom is constantly told he or she is useless or subject to the top/dom's every whim, told to stay home doing the only lowly tasks he or she is good for, devoid of an outside job, school, or independent friends, and otherwise made dependent financially and emotionally on the top/dom for any kind of support or approval, how do the partners know if consent is still being given of free will? Even though such a model of abject subjection and extreme dependency on one's dom or top is appealing to many people, top and bottom alike, there is a substantial long-run risk of entrapment involved. Such relationships can start off with freely given and informed consent, but risk long-run emotional damage as well as the loss of opportunities in life.

Not all such relationships go down such a sad road! But to not think about the risks in advance and periodically reevaluate the situation is foolish.

Blackmail and Financial Subjection


Some people fantasize about being blackmailed. After all, blackmail is a form of control. While this is an extreme form of play that is rarely talked about in public, it does occur consensually. In one variant, the bottom consensually gives the top control over financial resources like bank accounts. If the bottom does not do the top's bidding or maintain whatever agreement was made, the top takes away the resources or reduces the bottom's allotment. In another variant, the top investigates the bottom's life and threatens to reveal unacceptable details to family or an employer unless payment or acquiescent behavior are forthcoming. Obviously, smaller amounts of resources afford less risk. But most of the time I have heard of this kind of play, it involves astonishingly large sums, even a person's entire savings.

Clearly this sort of play risks the top's not returning the resources or using them inappropriately. Disputes, particularly between unmarried lovers, can be hard to resolve. Under ordinary social mores, many would doubt that anyone can possibly give fully informed consent to something so extreme. But it is a fact that people do play this way. For some it is successful play.

Successful forms of this play sometimes entail specific goals for the bottom, such as studying harder at school, losing weight, or more frivolous goals such as the bottom's learning to kneel each night before bed. The palpable reality of actually losing money can be highly motivating as well as erotic. Complete financial dependency or vulnerability can also be a form of erotic control.

There are instances of people losing a lot of money this way. You are very foolish if you think it can't possibly happen to you because your dom or top would never do that to you or because you will never have a dispute with your partner. The person you have negotiated with may be completely serious when it comes to the financial threats involved in whatever contractual arrangements you agree to. In fact, for many, the appeal of this kind of play is inherently intertwined with the top's "badness," seriousness, or unpredictability. On the other hand, there are people in long-term relationships whose subjection or jeopardy does consensually and erotically involve the handing over of such financial reins. After all, many traditional marriages throughout the world involve similar arrangements, with the female having no independent resources. Such arrangements, while they may not appeal to feminists, do not innately preclude happiness or love in life.

If you are considering such an extreme form of play, it makes sense to consider getting a good lawyer to go over any contract you sign. You should also consider the long-term situation you may be putting yourself or your dependents in if you cannot reclaim resources in the event of a broken relationship or contract. I don't know of any court cases to date of anyone suing to reclaim resources surrendered to a dom in such circumstances, but I won't be surprised to hear it come up eventually.Tops and doms can get used as well as bottom and subs, if the negotiations are not clear and mutually acceptable. For the top to provide financial support for the bottom with nothing commensurate granted in return is also unlikely to be tenable in a long-term relationship.

Online Financial Mistresses

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Fetishes With Massive Online Followings

The internet has enabled people to become a little less stodgy and more comfortable with their sexuality. They can gather- anonymously or not- to discuss a myriad of subjects related to sex on sites and blogs, forgetting about the supposed norms, rights and wrongs that society has imposed on them. After all, to each their own, right? The new sexual freedom has resulted in the surfacing of new fetishes, or fetishes that were previously unknown by most people. Several have gained relatively large online followings despite their unusualness. The 10 fetishes below may not be considered "normal" or healthy by people who don’t understand their appeal, but they’ve certainly earned their own niches. Please note: the list was generated on the premise that foot and underwear fetishes are the only ones that aren’t unusual. It’s a prude world.

Plushophilia: The "furry scene" has taken off in recent years, attracting a generation of people who presumably had childhood crushes on Rebecca Cunningham from "Tail Spin." These so-called "plushies" love teddy bears and other furry creatures that aren’t real. Some even like to dress up as animals, ascribing them human qualities; cartoon characters in particular are popular choices. The goal is to find a level of cuteness that stimulates arousal, and depending on the animal imitated, the imitator may also become much more cuddly.

Autoandrophilia: Both homosexual and heterosexual women have been known to imitate men and adopt their sexual roles as an extracurricular activity in the bedroom. Whether it’s their goal to assume a more dominant role, or simply to dress up, it’s not always the easiest topic to broach with a partner, especially if that partner happens to be a guy.
Agalmatophilia: Ain’t nothing like the real thing- unless, of course, your sexual fulfillment comes from mannequins or statues. And who can blame you? Most mannequins are quite attractive, which is why they’re so prominently displayed in the windows of department stores and boutiques. Statues can be sexy too, especially when they’re created by sculptors like Michelangelo who mastered the human form

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Paraphilic Infantilism: Perhaps Freud could have offered further insight on paraphilic infantilism, the desire to wear diapers and be treated as a baby. Mostly men acquire this fetish, though not all of them exhibit the same behavior when they’re partaking in it. Some adult babies play the entire role of a baby, including using cribs, toys and bottles, while others act their age despite wearing disposable underpants. Psychologists have hypothesized that many AB/DLs (Adult Baby/Diaper Lovers) desire a lack of control and power.

Maschalagnia: Believe it or not, armpit odor is an aphrodisiac for some people. The smell acts as a muscular stimulant, naturally encouraging arousal, reminding armpit lovers of their favorite part of the opposite sex’s body. Compared to other fetishes, it’s not that weird. But don’t tell that to people in Singapore, where an armpit-loving man was recently sentenced to sentenced to 14 years in jail and 18 strokes of the cane.

Hematolagnia: Given the popularity of the "Twilight" saga and the deathly combination of teenage impressionability and hormones, it might not come as a surprise that hematolagnia- blood fetishism- has seen a recent spike in popularity. Wannabe Bella Swans and Edward Cullens have taken to fantasizing about blood, biting each other’s necks as they partake in forbidden love. In most cases, the drinking of blood isn’t involved despite the association of the fetish with vampires.

Odaxelagnia: Odaxelagnia goes hand-in-hand, or maybe mouth-to-neck, with hematolagnia. The fetish is experienced when arousal is stimulated from biting a partner or being bitten by a partner. So if your lover ever tells you "bite me," don’t fret because he or she may actually mean it. Take solace in the fact that your lover could say many, many more disturbing things than that.

Algolagnia: With algolagnia, pleasure and pain are one in the same. This highly popular fetish is characterized by inflicting or receiving sensations, typically in the erogenous zone, in order to heighten the sexual experience. Psychologists have paid close attention to algolagnia through the years, studying the brain’s interpretation of pain signals and the patient’s ability or inability to control their subsequent behaviors. The previously held perception that the fetish leads to greater violence has essentially been disproven due to a lack of evidence.

Dacryphilia: Dacryphiliacs, or dacryphiles, are dispensers of pain, gaining arousal as they cause their partner to cry. They may also engage in algolagnia, odaxelagnia and hematolagnia, completing the superfecta of dark fetishes that are unusual to common folks but popular to the sexually adventurous, particularly those in the BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Domination and Submission, Sadism and Masochism) community.

Somnophilia: Intruding on someone’s sleep is downright rude. Intruding on someone’s sleep to, well, have your way with them is downright perverted. But hey, if it’s two consenting adults, one pre-consenting, then who is anyone to judge? Somnophilia can range from erotically caressing a person while they’re sleeping to intercourse, so it’s not narrowly defined by a single activity.

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Do you feel trapped in a BDSM relationship? It’s a fake one for sure

M/many involved in the BDSM lifestyle have been introduced to it through the Internet and online chat rooms. Online can be very intense and very special. It can also lead to great harm to many, just as realtime relationships can be quite intense and special and for others just as harmful. The possible harm in the online world is mainly emotional harm, though physical harm can happen when a submissive follows directions from one who claims to be a Dominant who is either uneducated or not a dominant at all, but a player.

What I wish to speak of now is emotional harm. Where most physical harm will heal, emotional harm can last a lifetime. I have seen so very often where a submissive is harmed because he/she gives all their trust to one not worthy of it. Submissives have several desires…a desire to please…a desire to be owned…a desire to be loved…and a desire to be treasured. These desires can leave a submissive quite open to being harmed emotionally. These desires are very intense, but they are very much part of them. And it is important that a submissive understands these needs and how to have them met properly. For an abuser, it is easy for them to become prey, if the submissive does not understand. An abuser takes these desires and carefully uses them to harm another. So please understand…understand yourself, understand your needs, and understand that with patience, you will find what it is you seek and your desires will be met.

Abusers use these needs to trap a submissive. They are very careful, they know how to manipulate the desires of another. They act as though they desire them…make them feel as though they are loved, but the one who is being targeted knows in their heart the relationship is not a good one. What the abuser has done, is draw the one so deeply in, they feel they cannot back away. Even though they know it is a bad relationship, the abuser meets just enough needs to entwine them. The abuser makes them feel as if they are the one who is at fault for any problems in the relationship and in doing this, the abuser sucks the life from them, but does not allow them to be free. Often, it is said, when online, the "Off" button is a safety measure, and that can work for a time, but once one is drawn in deeply by the manipulations of an abuser, it is hard to hit that button, but you can be free of abuse.

I am going to express in points things one should watch for and consider. If these things are occurring, please seriously consider what is going on with your relationship…

1. Isolation - Are you regularly kept from talking to others, be it in a chatroom or any other venue? Are you not allowed to have input from others? Are you with no real cause not allowed to talk to others who were your friends? Temporary separation from others does happen, but it is only for a limited time and only to give a submissive time to consider things and learn. But, it is this important to consider, is this one who claims to be a Dominant so insecure about himself and your relationship he cannot allow you to talk to others? A true Dominant is not insecure and will not keep you from openly talking with others, so that you also are secure in yourself and the relationship you are building with Him/Her.

2. Belittlement - Do you feel as if you are put down? Do you feel like less of a person than you did before you met this person? Do your insecurities grow as you have gotten more involved with this person? A true Dominant desires to build up and help to make others the best they can be. If it is the one they claim as Their own, that desire is even more intense. To a true Dominant, this possession is a treasure and will be treated with great care and love.

3. Terror - Are you afraid to speak openly to the one who claims to be a Dominant? Afraid that your words will not be respected? Afraid you will be screamed at or made to feel guilty for expressing yourself? A true Dominant will not do that. you should feel and you need to know you have a right to express your concerns and that they will be listened to. A true Dominant will listen to you and allow you to express yourself and then the Dominant will talk with you. Does this mean the Dominant's view is right or your is…no…but a true Dominant will respect you, just as you respect that Dominant.


4. Lack of trust - Do you feel a lack of trust for the one claiming to be Dominant? Are there many questions in your mind and heart which cannot be answered? In any relationship questions do arise, especially as two begin to learn of E/each O/other. But are you not allowed to discuss them? Or the answer, if you do raise a question from the other is a question, "Why do you doubt Me?" A true Dominant will desire to build your trust and security. As I said, in any relationship questions arise, a true Dominant understands this and will allow you to express yourself. The Dominant's desire is that you have absolute peace and trust, first in yourself, then in the relationship Y/you B/both are building and living.

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Trust your instincts and play safe !

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LloyoraDivine

Schedule - often
Turn-Ons - almost all fetish action and stuff, here not enough place to type about anything.
Turn-Offs - timewasters. My old accounts here " HotFlashVip" and " Lloyora" more photos you can check there
What you can expect from my show —I’m Lloyora Russian Fetish Model and Domina. Yes, kids, I live in Russia, I drink lot of vodka every day, playing on balalaika, fucking with matryoshka, dance with a bear in the Red square....Sometimes I do it simultaneously LOL
Why I Am Here-To meet new fetish people, here because its fun , here because its pleasure, here because i m online at camcontacts in dungeon category already 7 years, its like a drug ..no life without webcam.

QueenMorticia

Schedule:22-06

Turn-Ons:The ideea to be worship by you!! I'm a REAL mistress!!...respect and obey me! expert in hypnosis, cbt, cockold, sissies, humiliation and more..
Turn-Offs:Rude and unfaithfull slaves!!
What you can expect from my show:I am not just a woman, I am your mistress. Keep that in mind.
Why I Am Here:Sophisticated and powerfull, unbelievably beautiful porcelain Goddess for you to worship. Theres nothing you can tell me that would be too bizarre. "...your mind will eventually function only under MY orders

SMQueen

Schedule:Brighter days for you … mmmm, are you LUCKY!
Turn-Ons :I'm driving you wild as I lounge around, enjoy My SMOKE,pretty much IGNORING you, stretch My long bare legs, tease you with My PERFECTLY formed BARE feet, and SEXY LONG TOESNAILS
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What you can expect from my show:I am your Mistress. you're a boot-slut crawling around the floor begging to cum.
Why I Am Here:Financial domination you need Me becouse Im your Bank.!!likes nylon and lingerie,worship My divine feet, long toenails,fingernails)IM enjoy SMOKE UR FACE PIGY. SISSYWHORE CBT PAIN.OUTFIT LEATHER. LATEX PVC .COLLECTION BOOTS. HEELS.COAT. NUN. NYLON.STRAPON

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10 Dominatrix Training Tips

If you're a secret submissive and you dream of your woman dressed in latex and chains, you need to hear about these 10 dominatrix training tips. Not every woman is born ready to be in charge. Introduce your woman to bondage and discipline slowly. Show her what is in it for her if she plays along. Before long, your dominatrix in training will show you who is really in charge.



Question your motives. No matter what you do, your lover will not magically become a porn star image of dominance. Before you introduce your partner to BDSM, make sure you are doing it for the right reasons: to deepen the relationship and celebrate each other.
Start slowly. Gauge your lover's aptitude for dominance by asking her to order you around in normal, non-sexual applications. Try out some fantasies in non-threatening arenas, such as during phone sex.

Communicate. BDSM is always about communication. After sex or while you are feeling especially close to your partner, tell her you want to share some fantasies with her. Describe how it feels to let go of yourself during sex. Focus on the feelings of submission and dominance and how that would affect your relationship. 

Accept that you might not get everything you want. Getting a partner who isn't currently interested in BDSM to play your games is an exercise in trust. Keep in mind, however, that your woman might not ever want to be the kind of dominatrix you want her to be. 

Show her what's in it for her. Start with games of chastity: she gets to tell you when you can climax, and exactly how to please her. This is a great introduction in dominatrix training, because the payoff is obvious to her.

Don't top from the bottom. Spend extra time on communication before and after sex. Tell her the kinds of things you like, things you'll never be open for, and things you might want to try. Ask her to detail the same things for herself. After sex, talk openly about what worked and what didn't, being careful to word things in a positive way.

She chooses when, where, how, and for how long. In your excitement to play with the kinkier version of your lover, you might be tempted to set the time and place for these activities. Don't. You want her to dominate you at her own pace and for her own pleasure. 

Be open. As you continue to play these games, you both are going to reach levels of trust, communication, and intimacy that you've never experienced before. If you allow yourself to be vulnerable with her, she'll begin to see your sex games for what they are: vehicles for greater closeness in the relationship.

Be grateful. Without manipulating your lover, show her how much you appreciate her for playing along. Show your gratitude in ways that come naturally. Be physically affectionate. Make her breakfast the next morning. Send her to work with a love letter in her briefcase. This will let her know how important she is to you.

Continue to strengthen the relationship in other areas. Even though it is exciting to watch your lover transform into the dominatrix of your dreams, don't forget that isn't all she is to you. Continue to do normal things with her. Let her move at her own pace, and your dominatrix-in-training will surprise you in good, good ways.
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Rules and Conditions governing a Master/Slave Contract

                                                                    Source: Uploaded by user via ఉన్మాదంగా on Pinterest

The following points will be used to set out the rules and conditions that both the Master and the slave will abide byfollowing the signing of a Master/Slave contract.


1. Once signed by both parties, the contract will become active and binding.

2. Changes to the contract are at the Masters discretion and his decision is final.

3. The slave will obey his Master at all times. The slave will do anything he is told to do, no matter what it is and no matter where he is told to do it.

4. If the slave does not do exactly as he is told, his Master is entitled to use whatever corrective methods he thinks fit.

5. The slave will be attentive to his Master at all times, waiting for instructions or trying to anticipate instructions and acting in advance, but at no time loosing sight of the fact that he must always be available to carry out his Masters wishes.

6. The slave will have no life outside of the Master/slave contract unless explicitly agreed by the Master.

7. The slave will put his Master before any other person including biological family.

8. A slaves existing relationships may be allowed to continue, but only after specific agreement from his Master and as long as they are not sexual in any way.

9. A slaves role is to make life as easy for his Master as he possibly can.

10. Unless told otherwise, the slave will always call his Master, Boss.

11. The slave will keep his body shaved at all times, shaving it at least once a week on a Friday unless told otherwise by his Master. *****

12. The slave will keep himself clean at all times, always being ready to service his Masters sexual needs as and when he has them.

13. The Master will decide what part of the slaves body will be pierced and when the piercing will be done.

14. The master will decide what tattoos the slave will have and where the tattoos will be on the slaves body. The Master can decide to have any part of the slaves body tattooed including fingers, hands, neck, head and face.

15. The Master will instruct the slave what clothes he will wear at all times and for all occasions.

16. The slave will perform any sexual act required by his Master and will know that his Master would not put his slave in a position that might be considered to be dangerous.

17. The slave will not be allowed to own anything. All goods will belong to his Master who may do with them as he pleases.

18. Any goods the slave has before signing the contract become owned by his Master after signing the contract.

19. The slave will not be allowed to have his own money. Any money earned by the slave will immediately be given to his Master to be used as he sees fit.

20. Any money the slave has before signing the contract must be given to his Master immediately following signing of the contract.

21. The Master will set aside a percentage - from 0% to 100% - of any monies the slave has or earns, to be placed into a savings account. The slave will have no access to this money unless allowed by his Master. *****

22. A detailed account will be kept showing where all monies the slave earns or had before the contract was signed, is used and/or saved. This account will be shown to the slave at the discretion of the Master and will be at least once a year on each anniversary date of the contract signing. *****

23. In the event that the Master dies before his slave, any monies set aside from monies the slave has earned or had before the contract was signed, will immediately revert back to the slave. *****

24. If the Master dies before the slave, the Master will ensure that his slave is able to stay in the Masters home for as long as the slave wishes, providing the contract has not been cancelled and has been in operation for at least 3 years. *****

25. The Master will decide if the slave will work. If the slave is allowed to work away from his Master, his Master will decide what job the slave does.

26. If the slave is not with his Master, he will always behave as if he was with his Master.

27. The slave will only ever be allowed one Master.

28. The slave will always be available to talk to his Master, especially if Master and slave are not together. Master will supply his slave with a mobile phone which must be kept fully charged by the slave. *****29. The Master will provide a living environment for his slave.

30. The Master will deal with all matters concerning his slave.

31. The Master will look after the welfare of his slave at all times, making sure he is fit, healthy and happy.

32. The Master will only ever have one slave.

33. The Master will carry out all the functions required in points 1 to 28.

34. If either party feel the contract rules are being broken in any way, either must bring it to the attention of the other. *****

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Lick and suck the metal heel, slut!

Enema for my slave

Yesterday I decide to punish Slub because he wasn’t 
able to finish his morning task, so the thought to give him an enema was quite exciting.
“Slub come over here! "
As he walked in the bathroom ,I was both excited and nervous about what would happen. There was me holding the big red bulging enema bag with a big black nozzle.
He said "please Mistress, not with that big nozzle ". 

I just told him to be quiet, undress, and bend over the tub.

“No more comments you dirty slut!”
I told him that I have made the enema big hot and very soapy and proceeded to lube the nozzle. 

Then I put a glob of vaseline on my finger and told him to spread his cheeks. 

As I pushed my finger up to his bum I couldn’t believe how good it feels. After a few in and outs with my finger I pushed the big black nozzle up his bum.
I then release the clip and the enema starts to rush in. At first he was feeling good as always but soon the extra soap starts to give him cramp and he started to beg me to stop.
"No way Slub your going to take the whole bag" and started to move the nozzle out and in. Those made him feel good and took his mind off the cramping. As the rest of enema flows I started to rub his belly. When the bag empties I removed the nozzle and told him to hold the enema and put him a butplug.
“Do you want to go? I asked Slub while I was punching slowly his belly with my high heel black shoe. Or do you want some more? I know that your dirty hole is full and you will need to take all out. But you’ll not use the toilet….standing on your knees you’ll make it on yourself….And I will very much enjoy it!
I took out his butplug and told him to release all the shit on him….And he did …
“You’ll stay like this until I’ll come back….in your own dirt”….

And closed the bathroom door and left him in the darkness.

After 10 minutes I’ve come back and asked him to clean himself and also the entire bathroom…
“I will expect you upstairs to try my new latex long gloves on your ass….hurry up!”
!tzalist Webmasters Directory 

Happiness & BDSM

The most profound aspect of 24/7/365 is giving up one's life in pursuit of another. As scary as this may be to you, it's not unheard of. Everyone, I believe at one point or another, unrelated to BDSM, thinks about a different life, perhaps moving from a city to the country, going back to school as an adult, or leaving a marriage. I know that I have. And, there are a number of people who undertake such a change. For some people the psychological aspect of the change can be great, but small when viewed by others. For example, a change in lifestyle to loose or gain weight can be daunting to the person undertaking it as there may be fears that need to be dealt with first.

                      

Arguably, making the decision to be a 24/7/365 slave is not a light one and has many implications. It's not always as simple as selling a house, and can be a combination of problems and first up is figuring out how to deal with each of them. It's as though you are in debt. The first thing you need to do is figure out where all the money is going. Then you need to figure out what you can do away with and what you cannot. Just like debt, it's probably easiest to look at the simple problems and to keep in mind that no problem is insurmountable - that being a slave (or anything for that matter) is an act of sheer will and entirely your decision.


Second is outlining the major points you would want in an agreement with a Master. This is important. Whether you are dealing with debt, preparing for a marriage, undertaking a mortgage, or becoming a slave, you need to be true to what you believe you can realistically accept at this point in your life. For example, perhaps you need to visit your parents every couple of months - this should be an item on your list. These items are necessarily deal breakers. If you feel you cannot live without certain things, you should be upfront about such things. You also need to be aware of your limits. Ideally, this list will form (together with the Master's points) the basis for an agreement. Although not entirely legally binding (perhaps separate agreements such as a power of attorney, will, living will, etc. can be), it does establish a level of comfort between both parties.


Third, you need to obviously find a Master. This is just as difficult as finding a serious 24/7/365 slave. You need to find a Master who is experienced, sane, knowledgeable, and is into similar BDSM activities. Outside of BDSM, there needs to be compatibility as well. Why you ask? Well, you need to be able to like and respect the Master you will be serving.

In any event, I believe that choosing to be a 24/7/365 slave is just as valid as any other and is not impractical or impossible. It is up to you to decide what you want to do with your life and to make it happen.

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